compete with time

i feel sad right now. i have to quickly find new job. my current job is... unrealiable. my anxiety came again and made me procrastinate on finishing my whole plan for finding a new job. i am so pissed at myself. i cant do anything right. like, i always doing something wrong. you can see all the grammar mistakes i made in this diary blog. my english skills still suck, but i have to make them better as soon as possible cause this has to be one of my other skills besides my mediocre graphic design skill.

i am never good at anything. Everything I make feels mid, and the skills I have are just the basic skills everyone else has. but i dream big enough to get a corporate job. how am i supposed to convince myself that i can pull that off? i dont feel confident enough for this. i wanna cryy. i am confused. i wanna switch careers to data entry or admin, but i dont have enough excel skills. i have to work on that. but what should i do first? rewrite my cv? edit my entire portfolio? then what about my freelance job? it is not finished yet. how am i supposed to split my time? i am sooo slowwww. i am slow at getting things done. but the clock keeps tickling. urggghhh, i have to compete with such a small amount of time.

what should i do?

am i on the right path now?

plz tell me